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How to respond: “What are you?”
Posted: 30 January 2009 12:07 PM   [ Ignore ]
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“Excuse me, but what are you?”

People just walk up to you, completely out of context, completely without any interest in you except for your race. Hmm. This has always struck me as bizarre and insulting. But! I don’t want to feel insulted anymore - a friend suggested that I come up with some snappy answers that will also be an “educational” moment - alas, these folks don’t even realize how demeaning they are.

Do you have any good answers that work for you?
Crystal

   
 
Posted: 30 January 2009 12:40 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 1 ]
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I always say, “I am a human being” !!!

   
 
Posted: 30 January 2009 12:56 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 2 ]
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I have said that, too, but then they press on. Inevitably. “Yes,” they say. “But what are you? I mean, where are you from?”

I could say I’m from outer space. I suppose I could evade their question entirely and walk away. Or I could be snippy. Usually I give them the answer they want and tell them my race, but I’m getting sick of it. Still, I don’t want them to play 20 questions.  I’ve done that and it’s kind of old.

What do you do when people persist - and persist rudely?

   
 
Posted: 30 January 2009 01:51 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 3 ]
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I know what you mean. People can be really rude.

It used to get to me too, but then I started thinking, “life’s too short”! I don’t know whether it’s different for guys or not, or if we have a different threshold for other people’s insensitivity. I’ve kind of stolen the Obama “Mutt” comment, though I’m sure he wasn’t the first to use it. Helps people know I don’t take myself too seriously, which I don’t, and puts a tone into the conversation that keeps it light. That way they press on with a less abrasive approach and I still feel like discussing it if they have more questions. If people are just rude, then the conversation’s over....

That’s my point of view.

   
 
Posted: 30 January 2009 02:54 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 4 ]
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My answer is “I am a human being” for a reason. People who come to ask the question with love and respect usually have a very different tone. In my personal life, some people have become dear friends of mine because they started the conversation off that way. Same thing for my kids.

And those that just want to find a way to put us in a “box”, they may not be all that interested in getting to know who we really are anyway.

   
 
Posted: 22 February 2009 04:29 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 5 ]
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I often get this too, because I have Asian features that are combined with Caucasian and even some aboriginal (though slight), so people are always curious and confused. I grew up outside the U.S. so it seemed it was less of a negative issue then. Since I’ve move to the States, people tend to ask the question with as much curiosity, but with a somewhat tinged “edge”. I haven’t really gotten used to that, but I also get the curious questions as people still respond to my accent.

I tend to be straightforward about my cultural/racial makeup as I am very proud of the mixture that I represent. I think I’m better for it personally and it gives me an opportunity to share my thoughts on the matter.

   
 
   
 
 
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